Stop giving “Husband Benefits”


Okay, let me explain. We all date and wonder why some relationships don’t work. Well maybe because you’re rushing it. When you’re dating, that’s it you’re just dating. You are NOT husband and wife, and too many times we give certain benefits to people too soon. I like to call them husband benefits, you can say wife benefits too, where it applies. Ladies I have to say it, ‘you can’t expect the farmer to buy the cow if he’s getting the milk for free.’ If you don’t understand let me put it this way, if you give him your all now, he got what he wanted and is off for something different. Ladies we are precious rubies and we hold a lot of power, we just have to use it. Here are a few things you should never do for a guy when you’re ONLY dating:
1. Do not buy any super expensive gifts. Honestly if you’re brave enough to buy a PlayStation 4 for your guy, you’re stupid. He’s not going to reciprocate the amount. He’s not going to buy the ring. Most of the time it seems like you are buying the persons affection, and a relationship isn’t made off money, gold diggers are. If it doesn’t work out, he will not let you take it back, he’ll break it before you do.
2. You don’t have to spend every waking moment with the person. It’s okay to do things without your partner, in fact it’s healthy. Your life does not revolve around that person, and it should never. You are your own person with your own interest. Also don’t start ignoring your friends and family over a guy. It’s nice to spend quality time, but not all your time.
3. You’re acting like a wife. Don’t always cook, and clean his place. Don’t always go to family functions. Don’t always schedule things like appointments together. Now this has become a huge problem especially when you live together, and by the way it’s better not to live together. Don’t rush those responsibilities; they’ll come eventually if he’s serious about you. You’re Not his mother and you don’t need to do everything for him. He’s a grown man and needs to act like one.
4. Stop trying to save him or change him. That’s not your job too and honesty it’s impossible. A man will only make changes for his wife, and since you’re not, you’re not worth his time to change. If he does it’s his own agenda not yours.
I’m not saying helping a person is wrong; just make sure it doesn’t go overboard.


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2 thoughts on “Stop giving “Husband Benefits”

  1. Great list! much more readable than the ol’ 25 ways to blah blah blah…
    re: No.4 A guy might make changes for her before marriage but don’t expect them to last! At the end of the day, people only change if it’s in their best interests at the time. And changing anyone who is resistant to change is far from easy!

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